I’ve been single for what is now considered a ‘long time’. I’m personally not sure three years counts as a long time but, considering I had to count how long it actually was, I’m clearly not that bothered about it.
From time to time (or every other week I should probably say), I’m often asked if it bothers me that I’m 26 and still single or how I cope not having a man around the house. Clearly these people don’t see me as the strong, independent woman that I actually am.
The thing is, I just don’t care. I know what you’re thinking, a lot of people say this and they actually do – but I don’t, like at all.
You see, for me, in order for me to even consider having a long-term man friend in my life they need to add a serious amount of value to my life. Like, the type of value I can’t imagine not having in my life, if that makes sense? I am in no way interesting in a man friend becoming part of my life and bringing with it a serious amount of drama or the constant inner battle or ‘what ifs’ and other self doubting questions.
And no, I don’t get lonely. In fact, I pretty much love my life and the fact that I can do what I want to do, when I want to do it and I don’t have to ask ‘permission’ or take into question other people’s feelings. I don’t get lonely because I can fill my life with the things that I love to do, just without all the other drama as well. I don’t get lonely because I’m still living the life that I want to and I fill my time based on what I want to do, instead of myself and my partner.
In fact, here are a list of some of the reasons why I love that I’m still single:
- If I don’t shave my legs, no one cares
- I can eat as much chocolate as I want and not have to worry that I’m getting too fat and my boyfriend might dump me
- There is no unwanted drama in my life
- I don’t constantly second guess every action or thing that I say just incase I’m coming across as a psycho girl friend
- There is no one to get jealous about the fact all my friends are men and I’m constantly surrounded by them
- If I wake up and don’t fancy doing anything, I can sit in front of the tele and watch Netflix all day, without pissing anyone else off
- I don’t have to check if I do something it might be getting in a way of another plan
- I am a bloody strong, independent woman
- I can go on nights out and not have to second guess every conversation I’m having with other people, incase it looks like it’s more than it is
- When I get home from work, I can do whatever I want to get rid of the type of day I’ve had
- I get to share the MOST HILARIOUS date stories you ever did hear
- No one cares if I go out for drinks and don’t get home until 4am
- I can basically do whatever I want to do, whenever I want to do it
- I don’t have to ‘check in’ on someone else before I do something
- I don’t have constant anxieties that I’m going to screw up and push the person I think I might be falling for away
- When my head gets a bit grey I don’t have to worry about if my other half thinks I’m crazy and wants to dump me but doesn’t want to make things worse
- When things don’t go to plan in the man area, you can laugh about it with your girl friends and bin them off
- There are no weird arguments
- I have less presents to buy
- I don’t spend as much money
To be honest, the list goes on and on!
So, no. I’m no lonely and I don’t worry that, at the age of 26, I might end up alone forever.
In fact, I am perfectly okay with the fact that I might end up a lone for ever.
Cuz, do you know what? I’m a strong, independent woman and I don’t need no man to make me feel validated.
Love yourself first, then the rest will fall into place.